Amanda Black's Friday

I began my Christmas season by waking up at 4 am the day after Thanksgiving and venturing out in to the cold winter's morn to partake in the tradition known as "Black Friday". As my last name is "Black", I feel a certain kinship to things associated with the dark color.
My town has acquired a Kohl's and Target since the last holiday season, so I bundled up, drove through my local Starbucks (also new) and prepared to face the masses. I had no idea what I was in for.....
Target did not open until 6 am, so Kohl's was my obvious first choice. I had my list, I was ready to go. Pulling in to the shopping complex, my mom, who was riding shotgun, proclaimed, "Is that... people?" I, carefully observing all traffic laws, eyes on the road, hands at 10 and 2, had no clue what she was talking about. I briefly wondered if she thought the makers of my fine Starbucks coffee (if you are reading this Starbucks, I love you and will accept any and all gifts of your delish product) were producing Soylent Green to use as my coffee's whipped topping.

Nope, apparently Mom is not quite ready for the Alzheimer's wing at the loony bin, she was correct, there were people in line as far as my smudged glasses could see, wrapped around the outside of the super- Target (our Target apparently has super powers and a cape, that makes it SUPER).

The six year old in me wanted to immediately jump in the line. Surely there must be something great going on if people were lining up an hour before the store opened. When I mentioned this to my mother, over her snorts and laughter I think I made out the words "you can get in line by yourself".

The sixteen year old in me huffed "fine, but if I miss out on any awesomeness, you can only blame yourself". Apparently, she felt she could live with that.

We parked in the Kohl's lot and much to my chagrin I was able to park relatively close to the entrance. Where were the screaming masses scrambling for parking? Walking into the store, everything was well stocked, and the lines were moving in a neat, orderly, fashion. Where were the infamous BF fights? I wanted action!!!
The whole experience at Kohl's was....well, fine. There were no fights for the last Sonoma sweater, no one was clawing another's eyes out to get to the last piece of Fiesta ware. It was actually a pleasant experience.

We then drove to Target (not the same one that earlier had the Soy lent Green brigade outside) and on our way I stopped by Starbucks for another delicious beverage. (oh you Seattle brewing fools, I heart you). My mom was beginning to question my addiction to the mocha peppermint latte.

I parked a little further away from the entrance of Target than was required by Kohl's. It was at this point, only 7:00 am. (And yes, that is two lattes so far, but who's counting?) I was armed with my list, having scoured the BF ads online for the past month. Everything on my list was located in the toy section (Moms, have you ever noticed a need to ALWAYS go to the toy section even when the kids are with you? I mean the one time you can easily get away without going?) I reached the toy section and found the first aisle I needed to go down. Three ladies and three carts blocked my path. No, they were not shopping, they were chatting!!! Apparently," Peggy", hadn't seen "the other Peggy" since church on Sund-blah blah blah... get out of the way ladies.

I did not say any of the thoughts roaming my head, just smiled and politely said "excuse me". What I should have said? "Hey, ladies! There is a place for chatting, and the toy aisle at Target on BLACK FRIDAY is not it!"

Any who, I went to the spot where the digital camera I wanted to by my DD3 (on sale, 20 dollars) and gasp, the slot was empty....sold out. As was everything else on my list (of 3 items, but still!)

Then it hit me... this is why people get into fights, etc, on BF. They are irritated and disappointed that they woke up at an ungodly hour, made it out the door with the minimum amount of caffeine and weaved through the crowd for....nothing.

Silver Lining: My Target has a Starbucks inside....I swear it's better than booze....